in seniority my doubts about my ability continued as the cases became a little more complex. I was so grateful for my supervisor! (If you don't have a Sheri in your life, you should probably pray for yours to come). She was one of my greatest encouragers! Especially when I felt like I messed up and broke one of my kiddos.
When I say break, I don't mean that I literally did anything that would cause me jail time. I mean there were times that I noticed that therapeutic interventions may have set a child back a few weeks because they weren't ready or that I would introduce and activity that would bring up something and the client would completely break down or go into crisis mode. My supervisor had to remind me, that I wasn't going to break the kid. And even if I made a mistake and did something “wrong” I could always go back and fix it in the next session. There would, for the most part, always be an opportunity to go back and repair what I felt needed reparation.
How does this all tie in? Well it made me think back to those hours of supervision when Sheri would say, “It's ok Melanie you have to trust your gut and go with it. If it doesn't work out, if it feels wrong, there is time to fix it.” We serve a God of redemption, a God of second chances who would rather us walk forward with good intentions in Him than sit still in fear of making the wrong choices. If I have the ability to go back to a kid in a session and begin to repair something then what makes me think that God won't work to do the same and if necessary give me a chance to repair whatever mistake I have made in my spiritual walk?
He can do all things! If you have found yourself in a situation where you're saying, “ok maybe that wasn't what God wanted me to do.” Or “I messed that up!” Don't beat yourself up! God can discern your heart’s intentions! God can work all things out for the good! You won't break the kid! Allow God to work. He's been doing this a long time. Keep walking! The enemy would love nothing more than to make you fearful to keep moving forward. God is saying, "Calm down. I'll fix it. You won't break the kid. Keep moving with a heart for me as you learn my voice and guiding and we can do some wonderful things."
Pray for wisdom, the ability to be patient and obedient, and have a peace filled day!
Melanie N. Lee
I just REALLY love Jesus!!!
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